Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Binge..... it's just a word

I try and stay aware of the things that I say, and the words that I use. I have a whole list of words and phrases that I've changed over the past few years, more so in just the past few months. One of the words I stopped using was the word 'binge'. I did not want to associate with that word. I did not want to own that word to describe one of my eating habits. That word makes me uncomfortable. Why?

Well, I think one of the obvious reasons is that part of the definition of "a binge" is one of being out of control, and the judgement I put on the behavior of being out of control. I don't like the thought of giving up responsibility of my actions to being "out of control". I mean, am I really out of control? That seems ridiculous when I think about it, because everytime I put food in my mouth, I'm the one doing it, I'm the one "controling" it. I'm choosing to not stop.

But in the past few weeks I started using that word again. I started using it again because it best describes one of my eating habits....it just does! I mean, what else is it? Overeating? Yes, but come on....I have to be honest and call it what it is. I realized I wasn't using the word because of fear. What am I so afraid of? So stinkin what! It is what it is. Jeez....like a monkey on my back, and constantly trying to deny it's there.

Instead of fearing the word I need to change how I feel about the word, so I am. It's just a word. The power and feelings I give the word is under my control.

Eating can be, and is, joyful. Food is good. Life is good.


Amy said...

I've learned that words don't have power, but the emotions/associations behind them certainly do. You're on the right track: change the association and the word no longer locks you in. It's tough, though, to make that change in perspective, but doing so has great rewards.

Tracy said...

Amy, I'm learning.....lol!