Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Short and Not So Sweet!

Man....if I could say some of the things I really feel this would be a whole 'nother blog. Anyone who knows me in person must know how much I hold back.... Sometimes I dream of being the Dr Laura of weightloss! Here are some ridiculous questions someone asked me the other day when I told her that I had lost 50lbs in the first three months of my weightloss diet.

She asked "Was that safe?"

Are you kidding me? I told her, "Do you think weighing 250lbs was safe? Which do you think is worse?"

I only told her about my experience because she asked me if I thought a person (she) could lose 30 pounds in 3 months time. She then asked me if I had ever hit a plateau.....I told her that I never hit a plateau. To which she said, "That's what I'm afraid of...hitting a plateau!"

I said, "Are you crazy? Why don't you lose some weight first and worry about the plateau later? Consider yourself lucky to hit a plateau!"

When I told her that she would have to change what and how much she ate she said, "So it has to do with food, huh?"

"No, it has to do with eating!" I started to lose patience after talking with her for a solid 15 minutes, getting even more short and not so sweet with my answers. She then turned to someone else to ask their opinion!

Some people just keep looking until they hear something they like. In the mean time they stay fat. I saw her in yoga class the next day wearing a long sleeved shirt, and long underwear underneath her sweat pants....in Bikrams yoga! It's freaking 120 degrees! I guess someone told her she could sweat it off!

18 comments:

Juci RKC said...

Sorry, Tracy, I laughed :)

Some people apparently deserve to be fat and sick.

Beth said...

Isn't it frustrating? Most people who ask me how I can be fit and maintain a healthy weight after having 3 kids act all disappointed when I tell them I avoid processed food, do power yoga, and train with kettlebells.

They all want some magical shortcut to health.

Dirigo said...

I have been loosing weight from eating right and kettlebells.
I have lost almost 24 pounds and still going.
I brought in some of my clothes for a co-workers son. Most of my clothes were men's cause that is all I could fit into. One co-worker said, I should keep some of the clothes in case I put all the weight back on.

Thanks for the support.

Some people just don't get it and never will. Most of the people who see me working out at the gym with the bells come over and tell me I am going to hurt myself, and my joints will suffer.
I just smile and say thanks...........
You are truely an inspiration and you can tell people what worked for you, but they have to do the work, and some never will.

JenG said...

I love your attitude! :) You are so damned inspiring to me, it's crazy. I have lost over 100 pounds, I know how I did it, but then I lose focus (or whatever, time, energy, focus, will, whatever excuse I can come up with) and I gained 30+ back (more on the plus side. LOL)by doing the things that made me fat again. It really is that simple.
I am very glad that something inside you made you blog and continue to blog your process, ideas, thoughts. The help to me has been tremendous, so tremendous there really are no words to thank you.
Some days are harder than others, the days I hate myself - I am no different than yesterday but for some reason my brain wants me to think I am 500 pounds overweight and shouldn't be seen in public...LOL...and I don't want to come here and read what you say about being committed, showing up or being lucky on those days, but I always do and I always leave with knowledge and a smile.
It's up to me to commit, but thanks for the tools. Whoever this woman was, just didn't know what a wealth of inspiration you are.

Kirsten said...

"Some people apparently deserve to be fat and sick."

Seriously? This lady is attending (a) attending a yoga class, and (b) asking for diet/fitness advice, and still "deserves" to be in ill health? Sheesh.

Juci RKC said...

@Kirsten: sorry, in this case the yoga class and asking for advice seem to be only a facade.

Trying to sweat it off, and asking stupid questions? C'mon, please, really! :)
Losing serious overweight requires serious commitment. I don't see any commitment here.

She doesn't care about any practical advice, only, as Beth says, wants some magical shortcut - which, as we all know, doesn't exist.

She might not deserve to be sick, I give you that.
But in any case she will stay fat. This attitude won't be, can't be fruitful.

I didn't mean to offend anybody.

Maribel said...

She sounds like me last year! LOL!

We all know the answer, but we don't want to accept it because, like you've said a million times "it's hard!"...but it's so worth it. I was always looking for the “quick fix”…the diet fads I’ve done make me cringe.

I’ll take hard work over them any day. There is no comparison to how awesome I feel after training or the sense of accomplishment of making a delicious meal that I know is healthy.

Kirsten said...

@Juci,
I feel sympathy for this lady because I've been in her position, and I'll wager that anyone reading this who has or had a weight problem does too.

We're only assuming that the woman was "sweating it off" to lose weight; maybe she felt more comfortable being covered up, or it was some misguided attempt to "sweat out toxins." And I don't think she was necessarily asking stupid questions--the standard advice in all those silly women's magazines is "don't lose more than 2 pounds a week, blah blah blah." In my experience, there are so few people out there who have maintained significant weight loss that others are surprised to learn what a maintainer actually does to keep the weight off.

And, again speaking from my own experience, everyone has to learn on their own, and at their own pace, to adjust to a healthy lifestyle. This woman sounds like she's at the very beginning of her journey. The advice Tracy gave is true, but it often sounds foreign and intimidating when it comes from someone who is very experienced in diet/fitness stuff and is in such excellent shape as she is.

Beth said...

I am a fan and am always inspired by your posts but when I read this particular post last night, I was disappointed with its tone.

It seemed that you forgot what it felt like to weigh 250 pounds and sounded like you were mocking this woman who was covered up (probably out of shame more than anything else) while attending a yoga class.

No matter, she made the effort and showed up and it was better than not showing up at all. Right?

I think she deserves at the very least, encouragement in her journey, that's all.

sybil said...

I've been on both sides of this situation. I've been judgmental at others failure to 'get it' and I've been 300 pounds and desperate and shamed and not knowing where to turn.

To me.....it's almost like a switch - an internal switch - where sometimes I'm on my game - and other times I so far off my game it's scary. Petrifying, actually.

Once you've been tuned in to how much better you feel exercising and eating in a healthy manner and then you lose it and can't quite get it back.....cripes - I can't tell you how fearful it can make a person.

I try to practice compassion and understanding - not only with others but with myself. Get up, fall down, get up, fall down, get up, fall down.....I'm struggling to get back up on a consistent basis but boy is it difficult.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Juci,

I understand the feelings going on with everyone that has posted comments. Thank you for yours.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Beth,

The biggest reason why I got frustrated with this woman was because of her negative attitude....and because in the end she really didn't hear a word I said.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Dirigo,

As I've written here and as I've written in my book, few people really want us to lose weight, and no one expects us to keep it off.

I do.

Tracy Reifkind said...

JenG,

It wasn't in my plan but I will write about the reflections I have regarding own temporary weight gain during this month...just for you!

Tracy Reifkind said...

Maribel,

As I've written about before, I believe everyone knows the answers. I'm the one that believes in them....and sometimes I get tired of being the cheerleader.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Kristen,

Although I myself never would never think to say that anyone deserves anything bad in their lives, I do believe that we all may say or write something that is reactive, and comes across in a differnt way than we intended. "Tone" is hard to communicate through written words.

You were absolutely justified in pointing it out and I do believe that was cleared up.

Now for your comments to me.

I met one of my best kettlebell students after one of my yoga classes. I approached her one day to compliment her on her commitment to being there and giving it all she had. She weighed close to 300 pounds at the time. This is what I said to her.

"Hi, my name is Tracy. We haven't met before but I been noticing you in class and I want to tell you that I consider you one of the hardest working athletes in that room. I know how different this practice is for you and I find it so admirable that I had to tell you." And then I told her briefly that I had also been extremely overweight myself....which she found hard to believe.

She started to tear up as I was talking with her. She told me that she had been really struggling and that what I had just said to her made her feel as if she was doing the right thing.

The woman that I'm talking about ended up coming to my home to spend the afternoon learning how to cook and prepare her own foods, she eventually started training kettlebells with me 3 days a week.

She also became my Thursday morning training partner...that's huge when I consider someone capable of being my training partner!

She also is in both of my new DVD's which took us over two hours to tape, over 2000 swings and never missed a step. (You'll see her in the closing credits) I believe at the time of taping the DVD's her weight was closer to 225lbs.

What was the difference between both of these women? Attitude.

Sympathy and compassion are two differnt things....that's all I'm going to say about that right now.

In my defense of assuming this woman was "trying to sweat it off". I've had a regular Bikram practice for over 4 years now, that means I've attended over 500 classes....I've seen alot of things. I've seen people wrap themselves in plastic wrap, I've seen people in socks and stocking caps, I've seen people with girdles on and but this was the first time I've seen actual long underwear underneath sweat pants. I felt it was a safe assumption since I just talked with this woman about weightloss the day before that that was her motivation.

I do agree with you that many are misguided, and the "de-tox" thing drives me crazy...but that's another subject.

In the book I've just finished writing I talk about the 2 lbs a week myth along with many other "stumbling blocks" the overweight come across when trying to start to make changes. And I also believe that eveyone finds their own way.

Different things "trigger" different people to become motivated. When I asked this womand if she was crazy, she got my point. It was a point no one else had ever made to her, and she herself saw the craziness in the question.

My frustration came from her negative attitude. For every ounce of hope I shared with her she came back with doubt and disbelief. I let her bring me down!

I'll be more careful in the future.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Beth,

Do you really think I've forgotten what it feels like to weigh 250lbs?

Do you really believe I was mocking this woman?

Do you believe I spent a good 15-20 minutes of my time sharing my experience and knowledge with some one I wasn't trying to encourage?

Now I'm the one that is disappounted.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Sybil

"Once you've been tuned in to how much better you feel exercising and eating in a healthy manner and then you lose it and can't quite get it back.....cripes - I can't tell you how fearful it can make a person."

I really can't wait for my book to come out. In it I'll give you a new way to look at "exercising and eating healthy".

As I just commented to Dirigo, I will write about my own 20lb weight gain two years ago and the fears I had about it. (I did in fact already write about some of it at the time....)

The internal switch you write about is what I refer to as "triggers" Triggers can be bad, but they can be good too.

Everything you comment about makes me want to pick up the phone and talk to you! I'm not saying that I have any or all of the answers for anyone else but myself. But I do beleive I've got a differnt way of looking at things that can at the very least offer some relief. And wouldn't that feel nice!