Sunday, February 28, 2010
Andrea DuCane and I both love the color yellow....I want her sweater!
I've got to run off to teach KB classes this morning, and then I'll spend the remainder of the day back at the Cert. (I've got to go swing that pint of Ben and Jerry's, Chubby Hubby, off....it'll be worth it though!)
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
If there's one big ass lesson I learned this past year is the truth about over-training. I'm not saying that I was over training per se, maybe over obsessing about training is more correct, but either way, I wasn't skinner, I wasn't happier, I wasn't proving anything other than I had something seriously wrong with my brain!
I just spent 3 days at the San Jose RKC, and to be completely honest, I volunteered to participate, instead of volunteering to assist, as a way to earn my Recertification because I thought "Cool, I'll get a 3 day long workout!". BUT, as it fast approached I realized the day before that this wasn't going to be all about Tracy. It was going to be about becoming a better teacher, coach and trainer for my current and future clients and students....that was #1 priority!
It was my goal to hang on every word, to perform every drill and workout as instructed, it was to share my current knowledge with my teammates, as we all improved our kettlebell skills (I got a PR in my strict press btw), but I was there to absorb as much information as possible, trying to catch things I may have missed in the past. I wasn't there to show off, or ride coattails of my brilliant husband, in fact I tried to lay as low as possible.
But this blogpost isn't about the RKC, it's about my real life, before and after the RKC....
Last year about this time I was taking 2 yoga classes a day, in addition to my kB workouts, in addition to walking every chance I got. And when I started working at Equinox, in May, I was trying to attend Spin classes 4 times a week, in addition to double yoga classes, kettlebells, and treadmill walking......what did it get me? Did anyone notice? Is that why I was training so much? So someone would notice and say...."Wow! Have you noticed how much Tracy Reifkind works out?" What I hoped no one noticed was the 20lbs I put on, lol!
I realized at some point, thank God, that I was training, over training (?), over obsessing about training, out of fear.....I'll say that again, because this is important.....I was over exercising out of fear.
What is training supposed to be about? In my opinion, training is supposed to be about improving skill.....I'll repeat that again, because this is the important part......training is about improving one's skill.......not about trying to be better than someone else, not about trying to be the skinniest bitch in yoga. Training is not about trying to prove anything to anyone else.....it's simply to improve your best time, your best lift, your best performance.....and in a calculated, purposeful, conscience, and delibrate way.
Training, real training, isn't "Willy, Nilly". Training, real training, isn't desperate.
No one is counting workouts.....except you, if you're training out of fear and desperation. The fear of not being good enough. Desperate to never be fat again. Fear of losing some fake, imaginary competiton witht he rest of the whole world (who doesn't care, btw, except about themselves, and rightfully so! lol). Training out of desperation to not being judged, etc.....
OK....so how lucky am I to have come to my senses? I realized that training is about improving one's skill. At that point I decided that no matter how I felt about myself, or my bodyweight, my only concern was that I had to keep training consistently, but now my focus was only to improve my performance one class at a time.....but here's the really cool part.....I didn't have to have world record holding attendence to do that! In fact it was just the opposite.
Recovery is as important to improving skill as training, and guess what? Daily practice may not be what's best! Really? Yep, really. Whew! I've known this about training kettlebells for along time now, as I never train KB's 2 days in a row....but I was going to yoga everyday, in fact up to 10-11 classes a week....how can that be good? I was trying to Spin 4 times a week, M,T, Th, and F....good Lord, how can a person recover and improve?
I've revamped my workout schedule, but I have to confess that I still workout alot.....although it's more organized and it's not out of fear. My first priority is being the best kettlebell athlete I can, and I've supported that priority by never missing a Kb workout. My second priority is my Bikram yoga practice, but I'm now convinced that maybe a daily practice is not ideal. I still train 6 classes a week, but I double up on 2-3 days, so that means I only go to the yoga studio, at the most, 4 days a weeks....compare that to every single day sometimes twice a day! I spin only 2 days a week, on my "off" days from yoga, In fact I'm not allowed to go to yoga on the days that I Spin....which brings me to the inspiration of this blogpost.....
I've been meaning to write about this subjuct for months now, but it wasn't until today, when I taught KB's early in the AM, and then I went to Spin.....I didn't workout with Mark as ususal so I had some "extra" time on my hands.......yoga.....yoga.....yoga......I could have made it to a 12noon class.....but it's "forbidden" since I went to Spin earlier.....but I had the time......what else is there to do? Don't I have to work out more than every other woman on the face of the earth? Whoops.....I forgot that is a "goal, smoal" of mine and I've got to give that up, don't I?
OK, I will....for today.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Standing from L to R. Brian, Ben, Peter Lakatos Team Leader, assistant Marcus, Brendon, assistant Gerard , me, Loren, Leslie, Percy.
Kneeling. Tristan and Billy
Mark and I will be traveling to Europe this August for the RKC, so I was thrilled to have Peter Lakatos, from Hungary, as my Team Leader.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Here it is....
(anyone notice my really cool nail polish!)
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Watching everyone test the Snatch only made me more anxious than ever....I just can't wait for the whole thing to start tomorrow. I'm not worried about passing, I just want to do it well! I didn't see any woman take more than barely over 4 minutes to complete it! I've been trying to shave down my calloused hands, but who knows what they'll feel like when I get them on that 16kg tomorrow. I haven't touched a kettlebell since Tuesday, but I did manage to get my 6 Bikram classess and 2 Spin classes in this week (one of each this morning).
It's 5:15pm, ususally the time I'm finishing dinner and my "next to last" glass of wine, but Mark and I have to head out in about 1 1/2 hours to the Meet and Greet at the SJ Marriott.....if I get up extra early I may have more pictures! If not....I'll see you all in about 3 days from now, lol!
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
I have blogged over the past 3 years some of my exact daily menus along with daily calorie counts, and the thought process to how I pick my nutrition. I chose a vegetable (es) first, followed by a protein (ususally animal), add to that a fat, and then a "carb". And I've made it no secret that I always allowed myself a "cheat day" that included all kinds of craziness, like "Bake Sale binges".
It's no scientific secret that carbs hold water, so does sodium (damn cheese and corn chips). In fact "carbs" hold, per gram, 4 times their weight in water, and sodium 20 x it's weight in water. And I find that when I eat and "unbalanced" diet (yuck, am I talking about a "un-balanced diet"? Yikes...anyway...), in other words when I eat a ton of bread, or a ton of chips, or, God forbid potatoes in any kind of way, I bloat up like a water ballon, and then I have to pull a double Bikram yoga class just to sweat it off. If I eat a serving, or two, it has practically no effect on how I feel, physically, the next day, or does it reflect badly on my bodyweight.
I've often said that I don't believe that "fats" are the enemy. I never, ever, ever, buy "low fat", or "non fat" versions of any kind of food. I often say "carbs" are not the enemy. Although "carbs" are the last ingredient I add to any meal, it's only because "carbs" are easy to overeat, and it's a scientific fact carbs hold more water....and I feel it....and I don't like how I feel when I overeat carbs. I don't even think sugar is the enemy, in fact I know sugar is not my enemy.
Food is joy. All foods are joy. We are so lucky to live in these modern times where food is abundant, all kinds of foods, and we have so many choices. Variety may be the spice of life, but it doesn't, necessarily, give us all license to eat variety in large quantity.
This blogpost was inspired by a conversation I had this morning with a very good friend of mine who's made some commitments to give up a few things for Lent. The first thing on her list was "Sugar"....processed sugar.....OK....what does that mean exactly? I met a woman last year that told me that she doesn't eat sugar....ever! I had breakfast with her the next morning and to my shock, she proceeded to add 4 freakin' packets of Equal to her oatmeal....I guess that made it not only "sugar-less", but healthy too.....Are people crazy? I gave up sugar for a month a couple of years ago and I ended up binge eating almond butter gaining 3-4 pounds durng that month of "no sugar" (I blogged about it in april 2008). I replaced sugar with fat.....
Getting back to my friend.....the first thing I said to her when she told me she was giving up sugar was...."Sugar isn't the enemy, how you feel about eating sugar is". Her response? She told me that she felt bad about eating sugar. Well if you feel bad about eating something, then it's going to make you feel bad! How can it not? So, you have two choices. Quit eating stuff that makes you feel bad, or quit feeling bad about the stuff you eat!
There is nothing wrong with setting a goal that is intended to make you feel better about yourself, how you eat, how you look, how you exercise, etc....I'm a big fan for challenging yourself to rise above and do things that may be good for you, but challenging yourself to do things that help you feel better is the key.
Do you want to live in a world with no sugar? No pasta or bread? No butter or cream? No flour? It's not the sugar, carbs, or fats that are the enemy....last time I checked I've never seen a bag of sugar holding a gun to anyones head..... The enemy is you.
Quit punishing yourself, there's nothing wrong with you.
I've been able to drop over 10lbs this last 2 months without giving up anything. I still eat candy almost everyday. I eat dried fruit almost everyday. I drink wine every night. I've eaten corn chips a few times a week. I have real, full fat, cream, in my coffe every morning. Of course I eat all of my own homemeade soups, stews, salads, etc....I've even eaten out a couple of times. Am I eating less than I was? Probably, but I haven't counted one calorie this whole time.....I know when I'm eating too much. Why am I choosing to eat less these days? Perhaps that's another blogpost for another time....
For now, there are alot of ways to lose weight. For every weightloss success story you'll have just as many strategies, philosophies, and methods.....all of them work......if you're motivated by that particular method.
Stop blaming food. Stop blaming yourself.....you are your own worst enemy....now quit it.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
The point of this story is....well there's a few points....
I haven't been binge eating, not really. Another part of bingeing is compulsive eating, and I haven't been doing much of that either. Why not? Well, when I have the energy to reflect on my thoughts about it I'll share, but in the mean time one of the things I've done is to just relax. I can have anything I want, when I want it, and food will never run out, in fact I have too much food....I've gotta stop telling myself that or it wil always be true. I don't want to have too much food, I want to have just enough.
And, you know what? So what if I eat a thousand candy bars? Good Lord, it's my life. It's just one day in my life. God made those candy bars for me to eat, if I want to, didn't He? And He gave me free will to make the choice. And He made me smart enough to make good decisions, but if I make a less than good decision, he gave me the compassion to love myself regardless.....and to look back on the experience of eating a thousand candy bars and say to myself....."Good Lord, how lucky am I that I got the chance to eat 1000 candy bars?"
A few months ago when I noticed this crazy, huge, candy bar selection my thoughts were..."How much do candy bars cost these days?" I remember asking, but I don't remember the answer.....$1 each? Are they more expensive than that? Anyone know?
It doesn't matter anyway....I swear I'm going to buy one of each in the whole damn store.
OK, on another subject, but the same one......here's the plan.....
First of all, I can only buy one of any kind....that's the "rule".....maybe I'll buy the "kingsize" of my favorites......and, I know, because I'm the "middle child that never got anything", I'll eat my favorites first, leaving my lesser favorites for the end, as I attempt to eat through them all.....
Oh, and it makes me very happy to know that this whole experience will only cost me....what could it possibly cost? $40-$50-$60 bucks? Good Lord, I've spent more than that on a bikini wax, lol!
Bottom line, I'll wrap this up.....I'm talking trash until after this RKC weekend.....I'll keep you posted on what happens Sunday night.
I have a little video clip from my first Cert in April 06 that I'd like to share....looking back it's, well, it's interesting! Lots to reflect on....about my body, my level of fitness, my state of mind, and how teaching kettlebells, specifically the way I train the KB Swing, has become the focus of my life, when I thought it may just be something "fun" to do. Little did I know....
More to come........
Monday, February 15, 2010
So, as I search for a way to help myself feel better, by finding a reason to prove that I'm the better woman, I find myself being more critical than ever. Why is it that we have to break others down to feel good about ourselves......that's why we like reality shows.....so we can compare how messed up other people's lives are in comparison to ours.
It is a "goal, smoal", of mine to be truly happy for other people. Why is this so hard? Or, at least, why is this so uncomfortable? How long have these kind of feelings been part of our human culture? Or is it just me?
Either way, I know, for a fact, you must, truly, want for others what it is you want for yourself.
I want to be happy. I want to stay happy. And if that means that all of the rest of the world is happy, and skinny, and rich, then that's what makes me happy too!
Monday, February 8, 2010
Anyone that knows me knows that I am addicted to a line of workout clothing called Lululemon. Lululemon is a Canadian clothing company that has it's roots in dance, yoga, and running....anyway.....
Lululemon is as "designer" as it comes, and with that, comes designer snobbery! lol Lululemon has, what they call, their "Manifesto"....here it is....
Oh brother! I'm so sick of politically correct bull****, really I am. But I won't bore anyone with very many details....let's just take one of their manifesto phrases:
"Do one thing a day that scares you"
What? I mean. I get it, sort of. The message (originally quoted by Eleanor Roosevelt, but Lulu doesn't tell you) is, to not be afraid, and, as Nike puts it, "Just do it!"
"Do one thing a day that scares you."
Just one? Whew! But how do you define what's scary?
Besides the obvious scary stuff like, talking in front of a large crowd, asking for a raise at work or firing someone, telling your mother-in-law to go to hell, deciding to move across country, bungee jumping/race car driving/parachuting/rock climbing, etc., getting a colonoscopy, getting engaged, married, or deciding to have kids, riding a rollercoaster, blah, blah, blah....
Scary to me is, trying to make a decision whether or not to eat 5 meatballs or 4....yikes, am I within my "calorie range?".......(I made some killer meatballs tonight, BTW)
Scary to me is, wondering if I am going to be able to lead a fun, challenging, safe, KB workout today? Which is why I have my new Disturbed CD is ready to play, as a prelude to listen to, as I drive to PA for my morning classes.
Scary to me is, making phone calls....for any reason, to anyone....I hate the phone.
Scary to me is, having to make the decision to put one of my cats down if they get sick enough to cost me more than the "$300 lifeline" veterinary bill that I'll give them....although I'll drop $300 at Lululemon, no problem.....OK, I admit I'm screwed up....lol?
What is scary to you?
Eating "un-organic" veggies? (God forbid)
Not driving a Prius?
Wearing a bathing suit....in front of anyone but the backyard fence? (good Lord that's one of mine!)
Having your husband (or wife) open up your credit card bill?
Throw out those size 6's you used to wear....oops, that one is mine too.....
Going so long between pedicures that all of the polish has chipped off of your small toes leaving your big toe with traces of that deep purple glitter polish you thought was so cool at the time....oops, again, that one is mine.....lol
I asked Mark what scares him.....his first answer was "Getting out of bed in the morning", because, given his history with prior injuries he never knows what he's done the previous day, or in a previous workout, that may affect his back health from one day to another. Mark also quoted me one of his favorite phrases in relation to this subject, which is:
"Bravery is doing what scares you and not letting anyone else see it....it's not, "not being scared", it's doing it anyhow."
What are some of the things you do everyday that scare you, but you do anyway? And what is it that you're really scared about? Showing weakness? Failure? Or maybe you're not perfect? (whoops.....again, that one's mine)
Fear.....not letting fear be the excuse. That's the lesson and the message....at least that's my interpretation.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Friday, February 5, 2010
It's not the best picture of me, but out of the 12, or so, pictures I took of Sophia this day, it was the best one of her.....that should tell you how much I love her!
I took Sophie and her mom, Cristina, out for lunch at California Pizza Kitchen in Walnut Creek, and then shopping, of course! I've spent so much of the past few years being a snob about not eating out, and I would have preferrred to eat at home with another lesson in using the pressure cooker, but Good Lord give it a break. Eating a overpriced salad (that I could make better), with my 2 favorite girls was so much more important than bragging about how I never "eat out"......it was hard but I'm learning to lighten up....
I wanted to buy Sophie a dress for her March picture, and we found the cutest green dress with white and yellow daisies at Gymboree(St Patricks Day in March)....but we also had to try on sunglasses! Aren't babies fun? You can make them wear anything you want to, lol We, I mean I, ended up buying Sophie some pale yellow sunglasses with a daisy to match her dress!