Sunday, December 14, 2008

Restriction and Self Worth

A quick thought on Christine comments on my last blog post, "Calorie Police"....

It occured to me that there was a time that weighing all of my food and counting all of my calories was fun, informative and quite frankly, as I described it in a former blogpost, being "joyful". It was joyful because it was empowering, I felt in control...finally. Same with daily weigh-ins. But then it turned into self torture, why? So many people see calorie restriction..."dieting"....as exactly that "restriction", and how can that be fun? Restriction is restriction, isn't it?

I think it depends on whether or not we are getting what we want. Restricting how much money we spend to save for something we want can be challenging and fun, and make us proud to have made the sacrifice when we get what we want at the end. It was the same for me when I kept track of my food in a way that rewarded me in the end....when I was no longer rewarded, fast enough, it became policing.....maybe it comes down to expectations....instant gratification.

I don't think knowing what and how much you're eating is a bad thing, and I'll tell you what....I'd rather be conscious of what I'm doing than not. But when you let it control you, instead of you controling it then it's time to re-evaluate why you're doing it. My daily calorie consumption and my daily weigh-ins used to simply be data before it became a measure of my worth.

We are emotional creatures and how we become so caught up in our own judgements and fears of not being good enough or not "looking" good enough can seem, at times, to be a trap impossible to escape. The trap is when you use restriction as a form of punishment, and become tied to that number on the scale to determine your self worth. I don't have the answer.....just some thoughts.....

4 comments:

Jennifer said...

"But when you let it control you, instead of you controling it then it's time to re-evaluate why you're doing it. My daily calorie consumption and my daily weigh-ins used to simply be data before it became a measure of my worth."

beautifully written.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Jennifer,

In these times of such abundant and convenient foods we have to be able to look at our bodyweight objectly....it's way too easy to overeat, even if it's just a little bit everyday....and stepping on the scale is a way to make sure things aren't moving in an unhealthy direction.

Maintaining a "perfect number" should not be the goal, instead staying within a "range". (Darn, I should of said that in this post, lol!)

Jennifer said...

Finding that "range" and a comfort with it, with who we are in it, and with the fueling of our bodies to maintain it is what I think is key. I don't think I ever became comfortable with my body. My relationship with it has always been dysfunctional. I think many people, especially women, are in the same situation, and I think that is part of what fuels our obesity epidemic.

Tracy Reifkind said...

Jennifer,

For me, finding my "range" is defined by healthy eating, and I don't mean the health of the ingredients of my food, I mean the health of my mind to chose the foods that I eat and the amount that I eat.

I think what fuels our obesity epidemic is one major thing, and that is the abundance, convenience of cheap high calorie, nutritionally deficient foods in this country. My next blog post.....